


Untouchable

by Josey (cestus)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-26
Updated: 2012-07-26
Packaged: 2017-11-10 19:02:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/469635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cestus/pseuds/Josey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Visiting the onsen wasn't as relaxing as he'd hoped.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Untouchable

Steam billows bright white through the night sky, obscuring all but the stone path beneath his feet. Lee shivers, tightens his towel and limps forward. 'The onsen will be empty', he tells himself, 'if it isn't I will... I will...' He sighs. Will what? Limp around the pool twice like some ancient grandfather? 

No! That type of thinking will get him nowhere. He is on the road to recovery and no matter how hard or how long, Lee will stay on that road and give it his all until he is fit and able to fight at Gai-sensei's side once again! Yes!

His positive attitude pays off, the water laps calm and unoccupied against the edges of the pool. He takes a deep fortifying breath and lowers himself down, not having to hide his grimace at the amount of effort it takes to even dip his feet in the water. Three months ago he would have done this with youthful flash and flair, people would have been awed at his speed and spirit. 

His chin drops to his chest. Lying to himself will get him nowhere. The truth is that three months ago he wouldn't have come here. Hot springs are for old people or giggling girls, not for vigorous youthful warriors! But he has to try. Hokage-sama told him that he needs to give his damaged back as much of a chance as possible.

He slips into the water, inhaling deeply as heat seeps into muscles still sore and strained from the surgery. He is healing now but it isn't the magic cure he'd expected. It's taking time and with Konoha in turmoil he resents every second of it. He tries resting his arms along the pool edge, thinking to relax, only to flinch as the position puts an unacceptable strain on his spine. Instead he clutches his arms across his chest and, almost by accident, finds his scars. 

Up until now, he's made a point of ignoring them. He's a shinobi – always and forever, whatever the cost! Scars are part of the job and his collection was already pretty impressive. His hands and feet are a mess of them – but the ones he's touching now aren't like those.

When he came around in the hospital after the battle with Gaara, to find Guy-sensei at his bedside crying manly tears of joy for Lee's survival, he was told that his left leg and arm had been completely crushed. Since they hadn't felt crushed, just stiff and sore, he'd pretty much ignored them, being far more interested in when he could go back to training. And then the medi-nin dropped the bombshell about his back. After that, he covered his scars, hid them from view under his jumpsuit and determination, and concentrated on overcoming his misfortune. To dwell on them was to dwell on the past and that is something Lee refuses to do. His scars are reminders of his defeat at Gaara's hands, of his failure. And Lee has _never_ let failure get between him and his nindo!

Now though, he is confronted by them. Dressed only in a towel and with nothing to occupy his mind or insist that he hurries on to the next task, he has no choice but to see them. To touch them. They are numerous. Starting just above his wrist, they turn his skin into a virtual mosaic right up to his shoulder. He brushes a finger along them, already knowing that there are some parts that are numb. Hokage-sama says that the feeling might return in time, and even if it doesn't, it shouldn't stop him from training. The muscles and bones inside are fine. Healed and back to the strength they'd had before.

On his leg, Lee knows the scars stretch from the tips of his toes to his hip. The entire limb is a mass of silver tracery where fragments of bone had to be pieced back together like a kumiki puzzle. He has no choice but to see that every time he showers or gets undressed. 'The repairs took hours', Hokage-sama had said, as she hummed her approval at the quality of the work, and 'give it a chance kid, it'll be back to normal in no time.' Lee isn't so sure and won't be until his back is healed enough to allow him to use his leg properly again. At the moment it feels like an ugly, useless weight hanging from his hip and he thumps a fist against it resentfully, turning his face to the sky and releasing a frustrated huff.

He doesn't want to be here. He should be with the rest of his team helping with the rebuilding effort, or at the training ground getting stronger, becoming the very best ninja he can be! Instead he's stuck here, in the onsen like a useless invalid. He splays his hand and digs his fingers into the meat of his left thigh, some part of him wanting to force it to heal faster, work better. It doesn't help, of course. It simply hurts and he lets up on the pressure, stroking his fingertips over the oddly textured skin. It feels so strange, the way its healed. The scars are so faint to the eye that they are almost invisible in the wrong light. In the same way, if he strokes them in one direction, they're hardly noticeable. But when he does it in the other... 

He shudders at the sensation, odd ripples of feeling spreading out from where he's touching himself; a little like pain, a little like pleasure and yet not really like either. It makes his head spin, like the after effects of releasing the first gate. It doesn't feel right and, disturbed by the unfamiliarity and strangeness, he lets his hand drop to his side, grimacing as the sting of fear sours his belly. Hokage-sama explained the sensations as part of the healing process, 'the nerves are still re-connecting,' she'd said. But Lee just finds it odd. He's never made any claims to sophistication, he has Neji and Tenten for that. He is the genius of hard work. He is the one who keeps going against everything that's thrown in his path. He's the one who beat the Hokage's odds and survived the operation to repair his damaged back. And yet he cannot bring himself to keep touching his own scars. 

"Coward," he mutters at himself under his breath. "Guy-sensei would never be too scared to touch himself." Which has to be true. A world where Guy-sensei is scared of anything is a world too terrifying for Lee to contemplate. He knows the others mock him, and Guy-sensei, but he has to have faith in something and so far Guy-sensei has never let him down. Never!

So wouldn't the right thing to do be to confront his fears. Lee sets his jaw, deliberately places his hand on his leg and starts to touch. Brief brushes of fingertips, then longer more deliberate strokes from his knee to the top of his thigh that make him shudder and squirm. The heat in the water around his leg feels oddly stimulating, and he lifts his other hand to stir and swirl it, feeling it ruffle the hair on his legs and groin. It's nice and he feels the pain in his back starting to subside as muscles that have been tense for months relax.

Then the unthinkable happens! His chinchin starts to fill. It's not the first time he's had this problem. He is a man of fourteen and though not wise in the ways of the world, he is far from naïve! He understands the reasons for his body's behaviour. But his body is damaged and he is scarred in ways he cannot comprehend, so he grasps at something that does make sense. The water in the onsen is hot. 

During that terrible time a couple of years ago when his chinchin stood up straight every time Tenten shouted at him (which back then was a lot), he'd been worried there was something wrong with him. So he had asked Guy-sensei, who told him many fascinating things about Konoha's plants and wildlife and then said it was a completely normal part of being a man and that running many laps around Konoha and turning the temperature down on his shower would stop it happening so much. And he was right, as Guy-sensei always was! Since that day, Lee has always ensured the water is cool before he gets in the shower. 

But the water in the onsen is hot and he is still injured. Obviously he has made a terrible mistake exposing himself to such dangers while his body is too weak to handle them! 

He scrambles from the water as quickly as he's able and, clasping his towel tightly to himself, hop-limps back to the changing rooms. The showers, cool and reassuring, beckon and so do his clothes. Safely hidden away, his scars won't bother anyone, most of all Lee himself.


End file.
